There is a bridge over a river which I encountered in Haggerston. The river is called engine low. The picture shows a rather beautiful bridge over the river, but there are vines and plants that have overgrown this bridge. If you were to step back from the picture you would see that the bridge is also boarded off so that no one can enter or exit the bridge. The sun is shining onto this bridge and it looks wonderful, but no one can go over it. I can not get over, it would require knocking down a wall and ripping down a fence. It would require pain perhaps to do this.
I feel “How can I tell people about how they should live if I can not live by those values?”
The simple answer I feel is that I can not. This is not really a blog to attract people to read about God, although there is certainly people who have been reading these blogs. It is simply a journey that I am on and some simple thoughts about how I am progressing through this journey. Whether you take any of my advice is up to you, I am not telling you to live in any particular way for the simple truth that I believe God is the one who tells us all how to live. He daily convicts us to how we have been living.
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be acceptable in your sight,
O Lord, my rock and my redeemer
The reason that I can not go back to my old self is that my Lord Jesus, my rock is with me and his spirit convicts me, but he also prays for me. Jesus is with me and bears the pain. When I sin, and how bad I feel, I see Jesus at my side bearing this pain with me. He wants me to be free from sin and he will make me free from sin through conviction.
I had a dream some time ago that overtime I sinned on the outside there was a temple on the inside that would crack and would deteriorate and perhaps paintings would fall off the wall and windows would crack. But as soon as this inner earthquake was over then this man inside would be praying on his knees sometimes and at others he was praying prone on the floor, and the building, the temple would re-build itself. – I don’t know if this holds up theologically but I feel that is what is happening. We have to pray daily in order to build this inner temple up, and we have an inner helper – the Holy Spirit.
But how can I bear your problems and your burdens and your disputes all by myself?
Moses felt he could not bear the sins of his nation on a daily basis and so he needed help. We need help to bear our sins and to be free, to keep us free from sin through Jesus. So if you are finding it hard to bear all these problems and concerns of the world, seek another prayer warrior friend who can pray with you.
15 So he said to Him, “O my Lord, how can I save Israel? Indeed my clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my father’s house.”
16 And the Lord said to him, “Surely I will be with you, and you shall defeat the Midianites as one man.”
Gideon and Moses felt despair at times in the weight of the task ahead, or that they were unworthy, or that they were not good enough. But God each time says Surely I will be with you!
It is the one sure guarantee that we will be saved, that we will be white as snow and that God’s people will prosper over the ways of the devil. That God will be with us. He has not sacrificed his son for nothing, or for me to moan about how I can not do something, or how I am not good enough because surely God is with me and that very fact fills me with hope that I can carry on another day and thank my Lord God that I have been chosen. There are many more out there that God is waiting for them to make that decision so He can enter their hearts.
When we let God take command the vines and reeds are wiped from the bridge, the walls and fences are blasted away, and we can walk freely over the bridge, which is Jesus Christ our Lord, to meet our maker on the other side. That has only been possible because Jesus died for us, shed his blood, and conquered death for us, casting our sin into the outer reaches never to be cast before God the Father.
Lord forgive me of my sin, and let me be governed by your Holy Spirit, through your Son Jesus, from you our glorious Father. I pray that more and more people will come to see and experience your love, through our actions, through our lives, through our prayers. I pray that I can lift your name on high and give it glory through my life.
Amen